Threat Assessment

We talk in professional Domestic Violence circles about the threat of homicide when a woman stays in a domestic violence setting.  Frankly, any time a person lives amidst violence they are more vulnerable to attack, injury and even death.  I’ve heard it said (and I’d give them credit if I could remember where I heard it) that there are two groups of people living within the borders of the U.S. who KNOW they will be physically attacked from time to time:  Cops and domestic violence victims.  Cops tend to rise to the challenge and even enjoy a good wrestling match from time to time.  Domestic violence victims just have to live day to day in fear, knowing it is a fight they can’t win and could result in serious injury or death. 

There are two considerations when considering the threat of homicide.  The first is that living in a violent home makes one more likely to be a homicide victim.  The second is that leaving a violent home ALSO makes it more likely that a person will become a homicide victim. 

Look, leaving is dangerous.  There’s no delicate way to put it.  A man who is controlling and who is willing to use violence and death threats to get his way tends to lose his mind when the person he most wants to control tries to leave.  It is a dangerous undertaking best approached as a team effort including friends and family, law enforcement, shelters, physical and mental health care providers, legal services, and a host of other options that could include alarm systems, self-defense instruction, and relocation assistance.  Leaving and living safely can be done, but it has to happen with support and strategy.

So, let’s go back to threat assessment.  What constitutes a threat?  We find that some people have managed the stress of a violent home for so long that they can miss critical clues as to the rising danger levels.  How can friends and loved ones best assess the threat level from the outside and then communicate their fears in a way that the domestic violence victim finally understands how bad it is getting? 

Let’s start with a list of situations that statistically show a greater risk for homicide:

• History of weapons use
• Unemployment of the abuser
• Substance Abuse
• Previous History of Violence (Especially if there has been Strangulation)
• Abuse During Pregnancy
• Ignoring Court or Lawful Orders
• Killing of a Pet
• Violence Toward Children
• Suicidal Ideations

Any one of these factors in a violent relationship is a red flag that a homicide and/or a homicide & suicide is a real possibility, and when you factor in two or more it gets exponentially more dangerous.  When we see one or more of these factors in a case, we tend to take that case more seriously and go into “homicide prevention” mode.  I’m not a big stat guy, but let’s take a look at a few hard-core stats to make the point.

According to the U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ), a woman is TWENTY TIMES more likely to be murdered if she’s been threatened by an intimate partner with a knife or gun, and its almost FIFTEEN times more likely if he’s ever made a death threat.  Take a look at DOJ’s top five pre-homicide risk factors, and note the ugly increase in risk noted after each factor: 

• Ever threatened to use a deadly weapon against victim? (20.2x)
• Ever threatened to kill or injure victim? (14.9x) 
• Ever tried to strangle (choke) the victim? (9.9x)
• Has abuser ever forced victim to have sex? (7.6 x)
• Is abuser violently or constantly jealous? (9.2x)  

What does this all mean to a friend or loved one of a person living in domestic violence? It means the risk is rising when one or more of these factors are present. It means she needs help, even if she can’t accept that right now. Stay with her, offer her support, strength and options. Be patient, even when you are terrified, and love them even when they aren’t seeing the danger. It may be the next conversation when you show her some of these stats that is the very one to finally guide her into an environment in which professionals are willing, able and equipped to help…and that could make all the difference in a lifetime.