Using Our Inside Voice: The Power of Intuition

This post is for the whole choir, whether it be the victims, the friends of victims, the cop investigating the crime, the social worker who is trying to make reason of a bad situation, or the stranger who happens to be walking by a house and hears sounds of what could be a domestic assault in progress.  I’ll sum up the whole message in four words:  Listen to your intuition. 

“When you are at imminent risk, intuition forgets about all…logical thought and just sends the fear signal.  You are given the opportunity to react to a prediction that has already been completed by the time it comes into consciousness.”  Gavin De Becker wrote that in his book, “The Gift of Fear:  Survival Signals” (Little, Brown & Company, 1997, page 88).  The point in that paragraph and in the entire book for that matter is that people who listen to their inner voices tend to survive a lot longer and live lives of greater quality.  That voice, sometimes called intuition, is what keeps you from walking down dark alleys or going out on a date with a guy who gives you the creeps.    

De Becker lists the messengers of intuition:  Nagging feelings, persistent thoughts, humor, wonder, anxiety, curiosity, hunches, gut feelings, doubt, hesitation, suspicion, apprehension, fear (73).  Perhaps you’re having an irrational fear as you dip your toe into ocean water while gazing out toward the sunset, but it is likely your anxiety is that voice telling you there’s a nine-foot bull shark sniffing around in the shadows ten yards out.  Maybe the guy I’m investigating for allegations that he forged some checks is innocent, but my gut is telling me that he’s also good for some robberies and muggings we’ve had in the same area. 

I had a sociology professor in college who swore that human beings had lost all instinct and intuition as we developed higher brain functioning and reasoning skills.  He was an idiot who eventually died at the hands of his pre-menopausal wife*.  I assume he made that announcement, always in an indignant tone, and always on the first day of each semester, just to provoke a big fight in the classroom.  How could he argue such a point when every human alive knows that voice exists?  There are universal mysteries out there, and one of them is how we sometimes know without knowing.  Given that, isn’t it prudent to pay attention? 

Which is exactly what I’m asking you to do.  If you have a nagging feeling that your sister is getting attacked by your brother-in-law or you have a suspicion that your ex boyfriend is watching you, you’re potentially right.  Embrace it for the free knowledge that it is before you actually have to pay for having not listened.  If the voice calls you to act, take action.  If that means you suddenly feel the overwhelming compulsion to run from an underground parking garage, kick off your heels and be a track star. 

I’ve had two overpowering memorable screams from my intuitive voice in my lifetime.  One was to stop riding motorcycles.  I had ridden for years, but something told me my luck had run out.  A couple of weeks later I was rear-ended while driving my car, struck so hard that I was never able to open the driver’s side door again.  If I’d been on two wheels, there would have been little or no chance for survival.  Did my voice save me?  I gotta say it did, although logically there’s no way to know if I would have been riding that day had I not listened to my gut. 

The second came a couple of years into my career when I stopped two thugs pulling into one of the most notorious apartment complexes in my city.  I was alone, and I knew my backup was several minutes away.  Both men calmly got out of the car and walked a short distance into shadows.  They stopped and turned when I hailed them, but something in the way they looked at me…I don’t know, it was like they had me and they knew it.  I’d spied two other men deeper in the shadows, but I don’t know if they had additional friends around the corner or heavy firepower under their jackets.  I just knew, with all my heart I knew, that I was walking into a trap they’d set. 

And I bid them goodnight.  I like to think I wasn’t a coward that night.  Some officers would say I was, I suppose.  I didn’t have evidence of any serious crimes, just traffic infractions, but I’m certain they carried weapons, dope or both.  What can I say?  I backed off to live another day, and I believe I would not have survived that night if I’d ignored my hunch.  I can’t prove it; I just know it with certainty. 

We hear a lot about intuition from stalking victims.  They often know with the clarity of a flashing sign that they’re being followed or are under surveillance.  I’ve often heard, “I feel silly for calling, but I just have a feeling that he’s watching me.” 

I’m glad they call because I’d much rather have officers check the area and make sure she’s safe than blow off her nagging feeling and leave her to be hurt.  Which one do you think would be easier for a police officer to live with? 

The way to live this life is to strike a balance between wariness and paranoia.  Too little in one direction and you end up getting hit by a bus; too much and you arrive at mid journey worn and insane.  There is no quarter given in this world for extreme naiveté, but by the same token you don’t have to go overboard and become a cynical hermit.  The balance lies in trusting yourself to know your limits, listening to your inner voice when it calls for you to tread cautiously, and allowing yourself to ask for help when appropriate to do so. 

We are the richest of beings in that we have been endowed with higher reasoning and brain function in addition to our instincts and intuitions.  When we combine all of these innate skills, we have the potential to achieve a life-harmony and internal alarm system unique in the entire world.  And it is that very combination that allows us to dream, create, conquer challenges, and run like a gazelle when predators try to pounce.

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* Okay, I made that up, but he was still an idiot.